Valentine's Day

Happy Non Existant Holiday. I used refer to this day, lovingly of course, as "kill Cupid Day". Granted, this was before I met Tim and actually had an official Valentine. In my heart, I still feel its "Kill Cupid Day", but I must admit its alot more fun with Tim and the kids around. The pressure is off, if that makes any sense.

So here I sit, still filled up. With no real appetite. I have now realized that its hard to make breakfast, lunch and dinner for others when you really have no interest in eating. In the interest of being a good sport and semi romantic, I prepared homemade crab and shrimp ravioli with a lemon butter sauce. Sounds gourmet. Tim loved it, I ate two which took me thirty minutes, and Nala was more interested in the bag of candy she received from school for Valentine's Day.

My mind is still learning to catch up with my stomach and the full feeling. The truth is I am not really sure when I am full. I feel like I need to hiccup which helps me know I need to stop eating, however, I do not have the feeling of fullness in my lower stomach like I did prior to surgery.

Having said that I have begun to take stock of when I eat just out of sheer boredom or emotional eating. I hate to admit it, but I do that more often than not. I guess thats where the "therapy" part of this journey is supposed to come in.

Well, between me, you and the keyboard I am done with therapy. I am in no mood to pay $25.00 a week to dredge up stuff that happened years ago that may now cause me to overeat. That is what the blog is for. I understand that I eat emotionally. I understand that I eat when I am frustrated, bored, or upset. My surprising revaletion is I eat when I am tired. I recognize these issues. Instead of going to a therapist to tell him or her these things when I can tell everyone else who is willing to listen for free!

I will put the $25.00 per week aside for the hot new wardrobe I will be buying this time next year.

Until the next time,

Your recovering fat girl
Mikki